She Changes the Agreement Again

Last week (or was it the week before?) I signed our Settlement Agreement and gave it to my wife. Today I got it back from her, but it was not the same agreement. Her lawyer had made three changes, printed it up, and they signed it. I would need to sign this as well to make it legal.

I have to run this through my head again. We had both agreed in email. There were no problems with it. I paid my lawyer to print the document (for the 3rd time). I signed it. Then they made up a new agreement which was not negotiated.

Is that really how it is supposed to work?

There is pressure for me to sign their version; the non-negotiated version. I suppose that was their plan anyway. And despite their disregard of the negotiating process, I could sign it, except that I disagree with at least one of the changes.

They completely removed any reference to "Shared Parenting." That term was the result of our mediation. With that removed, we are pretty much back at my wife's original position and I have surrendered on everything.

The shared parenting reference doesn't appear to affect the terms of the settlement any, except that it may be valuable when we "re-evaluate" our daughter's time in two years (which my wife insists upon). At that time, I suspect my wife will try to reduce my time with our daughter. This is exactly what she did with her first child and her father. She whittled away his time, either legally or illegally, until he had almost none. She doesn't like to share parenting. She insists on being the only parent, as I have witnessed for many years.

So I am sticking to my guns on this one. After all, we had agreed on it before. Why should we remove the phrase now?? And as we exchange emails about it, she is pushing me to sign as the only way I will get her to move out. (So now I see that she feels her presence at home is punishment to me. And it is punishment most of the time, but I didn't know it was being used as such on purpose.)


Let's just stick to what we agreed on, I tell her. Put the phrase back and you will have almost all of my money. She will get back to me tomorrow.